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Literature Text
He screams her name. Her body falls. His anger pulsates like the throbbing vein on his forehead. His fists are a blur of furious punches while he rages at her, blaming her for his ruined life.
Daddy stop.
He roars and throws her limp body across the room, sending it right onto the coffee table. Shattered glass and broken wood pierce through her skin, causing the red liquid to ebb out of her soulless carcass.
Daddy please.
He yells at her for not having the guts to get up; he doesn't know she'll never move again. He slaps her around and tosses her against the wall like a rag doll.
Don't you love me daddy?
He picks up a pillow and throws it at her. His fury is weakening, sliding away as he realizes why she isn't fighting back, crying, screaming or running like she had before.
Why don't you love me daddy?
His anger diminishes as he kneels beside the crumpled body. A lifeless shell that was battered, broken and bleeding. Tears start falling from his eyes.
I love you daddy.
But he'll never know.
Daddy stop.
He roars and throws her limp body across the room, sending it right onto the coffee table. Shattered glass and broken wood pierce through her skin, causing the red liquid to ebb out of her soulless carcass.
Daddy please.
He yells at her for not having the guts to get up; he doesn't know she'll never move again. He slaps her around and tosses her against the wall like a rag doll.
Don't you love me daddy?
He picks up a pillow and throws it at her. His fury is weakening, sliding away as he realizes why she isn't fighting back, crying, screaming or running like she had before.
Why don't you love me daddy?
His anger diminishes as he kneels beside the crumpled body. A lifeless shell that was battered, broken and bleeding. Tears start falling from his eyes.
I love you daddy.
But he'll never know.
Literature
He Should've Said No
A pair of smooth, pale lips leaned towards his ear, "Come with me."
The boy's grey eyes widened, "No."
The lips continued to speak, words burrowed like little murmuring worms into the boy's love-sick brain, "I can show you the world. You'll never know what you missed unless you come with me."
"No." But his heart was thumping.
"I can play you such sweet music."
"No." Yet, despite his refusal, the boy's feet were itching.
"Let me show you how the sunshine can glitter off sand on far-flung beaches-"
"No."
"-As the sun sets on the horizon."
"No!" the boy almost shouted.
Twitching, the lips smiled, "Are you
Literature
cry for...
cry for...
the girl who sees fat
in all the wrong places
and wishes for a way
to eliminate it quickly
the boy who strayed
popping pills like candy
nearly drowning in sorrow
and creating a single red line
the girl who feels deformed
no matter what you see in her
how lovely she truly is
she's convinced it's all lies
the boy who has to hide himself
and holds more secrets than you know
but let's me see inside his heart
and stays strong for us both
the girl who just wants love
but keeps doing it the wrong way
she may not see it but i can
and she needs help before it's too late
cry for us, strangers to you
but not to others
Literature
.tell me a lie_
she said, "Lie to me"
he said, "I love you"
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Sorry guys. I don't even know where this came from.
It's sad. Really sad.
Seeing the comments on here...Child abuse is a serious thing. It's so easy to just sit in our comfy houses on our brand new computers and forget about the rest of the world. But this is actually happening. The most saddening thing is when people have commented on this to tell me 'that happened to me' or 'this reminds me of myself'. THIS IS REAL. It's not some fake little story. It's real, and it's serious. Get it out there. Open eyes and warm hearts. Touch those who have struggled through something like this. Take a stand for those who can't stand anymore.
Edit: Critiques are very welcome. My goal is to one day have a writing good enough to become a DD, so if you have input on how I can make this story better, please critique!
It's sad. Really sad.
Seeing the comments on here...Child abuse is a serious thing. It's so easy to just sit in our comfy houses on our brand new computers and forget about the rest of the world. But this is actually happening. The most saddening thing is when people have commented on this to tell me 'that happened to me' or 'this reminds me of myself'. THIS IS REAL. It's not some fake little story. It's real, and it's serious. Get it out there. Open eyes and warm hearts. Touch those who have struggled through something like this. Take a stand for those who can't stand anymore.
Edit: Critiques are very welcome. My goal is to one day have a writing good enough to become a DD, so if you have input on how I can make this story better, please critique!
Comments155
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Overall
Vision Originality Technique ImpactWell, I can honestly say I wasn't exactly expecting this when I decided to take a look.
Being an adult that was beaten by one parent only to be taken away and given to a neglectful parent, this hits a little closer to home for me.
Your use of short, concise sentences mirrors the father's mental state. He's so pissed he can't even think straight. Not until it's too late.
After finishing this, I wonder if he even cares that she's dead. The other thing I wonder is the age of the girl.
It's short and to the point. More detail could have evoked more emotion, but with the subject matter and how delicate the subject is, I don't think more detail would have helped.
-Reaper
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